Perspective

After one month in my new postdoctoral place of work, I went back to my old lab today to backup some data.

3pm on a Friday afternoon. Not too many people around. Firstly, PG himself was off on vacation, then Deena, our supervisor had her usual annual bout of pneumonia. Lori, my ex-lab roommate and good friend, was also off on vacation (why in the world are so many people taking vacation in the beginning of November?). Importantly, Anwesha, the new graduate student, was off at classes. Which meant I had full freedom to sit at her desk and pull out my data from the deep depths of her computer. I suppose I no longer felt any sense of possession of that computer and desk, which had been mine for 5 years. But as soon as I entered the room, the sheer neatness of it made me lose any sense of nostalgia or ownership of that room or desk or computer- it looked nothing like the way it used to.

Copying my files, I came across many presentations which I hadn't opened or seen in years. Here are some titles of some of my presentations at lab meeting: "The Science of Language: A Primer", "Food, Sex and Fruit flies", "Jeopardy!", "Anxiety in Pregnant Rats" and so on. PG would gently remind me, at the end of these talks, that perhaps I should concentrate on something related to my thesis project, or at least that was pertinent to the vast field of Microbiology, if not infectious diseases. But he never stopped me from giving these HOUR-long presentations on completely irrelevant topics, nor did he make me feel like I was wasting his time or the lab's. These presentations reminded me forcefully about what a truly great place I trained at. I couldn't have asked for a better mentor to do my PhD with.

What a wise mentor PG is!

Nonetheless, I am SO happy I am no longer working on the project that I was! No project dealing with disease pathogenesis is easy, but seriously, noncytolytic CD8 antiviral mechanisms are, to me, the most frustrating. And after 5 years of working on that stuff, I still don't have enough data to publish a complete story. It's enough to make a sane person completely sick with rage and impotence. *Deep breath* it's okay. It's okay. It's all over now.... more or less.