Before returning to India, Ram perused a few R2I (Return to India) blogs- there are many out there, explaining which schools to target, where to live, whether to rent or own, which cars to buy etc. He was especially taken with the lists that people would make about what to get and how to get it. There are people who planned every step of their move back and who wrote about it.
Somehow for our return, I didn't plan as much as I normally do. I assumed that things would sort themselves out some time. We had some grand visions (my dad called them "unreasonable and half-baked". Turns out he was right) while still in Pittsburgh about what we would do in India, but those didn't pan out quite as we had envisioned. Maybe I'll type out the details of that venture at a later point.
But we made some mistakes and took some wrong turns, but thankfully turned back before committing to anything drastic. This was our lowest point, as a couple and as a family. Had we continued on the wrong paths, we would have compromised on a lot of things, including integrity and happiness. Our mistakes did cost us a lot financially, but hopefully, that's only temporary. I still think that things are in the process of sorting themselves out and that we don't have to worry too much or plan too far ahead. And so far, my belief has been correct.
I'm in the process of a pretty big change in terms of career paths. I've spent the last 10 years (14, if you count my undergrad days) training to become a basic scientist. Now I'm changing gears to become a childbirth educator and counselor for pregnant women. Would I have committed to this choice, if we hadn't gone through a period where we questioned our beliefs and actions? I think not... I tend to be a chronic ditherer and I would have probably continued dithering. But somehow, something has worked out and I have been offered a opportunity of a lifetime. There's not much money in it, but there's the promise of fulfillment and meaning.
Similarly, Ram too has chosen his workplaces with care, making sure that these offer him something more than just clinical revenue. His work at an HIV clinic and at a charity hospital enable him to function by being true to his core.
It takes time to settle and to find the right spot to settle.... I wonder if all the other people who write those R2I blogs also felt the same, or if they jumped into work full swing right away.
These days, I end every day by feeling grateful to whatever higher being is controlling our lives (if there is such a one), for the opportunities given to us and for the support we have from our parents and extended families and friends. It's good place to be.
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